The Last Day...sort of...

One of the things that I miss about being a classroom teacher was the feeling of finality that occurred on the last day of school. When the bell rang at 3 PM on that final day, and the students came pouring out of the school with whoops and hollers, I knew that the year was over, and there was a sense of completion, as well as a letting down of the guard, as I knew I had a few weeks away from my job.

Today was the last day of school for students in my district, and (unlike many other years) I actually made it out into three of the schools today, to one elementary school and to both Tichenor Middle School and Lloyd High School. The atmosphere was different from school to school. At the high school, the students were busy taking exams. At the middle school and elementary school, students were mostly celebrating the end of the school year. But at all three buildings, the teachers I saw had these big grins on their faces. They knew they just had a few hours left.

I don't have those same feelings at all. When I first started as the district's technology administrator, I did. I only worked a couple of extra weeks a year, a couple at the beginning  of the school year and a couple at the end. But as my responsibilities grew, so did my "extra" days of work, so that now I don't really get all that much time off. There's no sense of an end of a school year. Everything runs together. This morning, on the district website, I posted at the top of the page the first day of school for students NEXT school year. It'll sit there all summer for students and parents who forget, but it's strange to be posting the date before students are even out of the door for this year. Same with new staff members. Teachers do so much more work over the summer in the buildings than they used to do. I USED to create new teacher computer and email accounts the first week of August, but I've created four new staff accounts already, because the school is arguing that these new staff members need to receive messages over the summer.

One year bleeds into the next...

The End of the World

I've been told tomorrow is the beginning of the end of the world. Specifically, the rapture--that moment when all of the true believers in Christ will be whisked away to heaven--is supposed to happen. Like most people, I think the chances are pretty much zero. I don't even believe in the rapture at all (at least, not in the way that it's been described in popular culture through things like the LEFT BEHIND series), much less that it's going to happen tomorrow. But, as a Christian believer, I feel it prudent to plan ahead in the event that tomorrow really IS the day of the rapture and I am one of the chosen ones. So here's a note--a final blog entry--I'm leaving behind for those of you who were NOT taken body and soul up into heaven...

• First, let me say this to you Bible-thumping, passionate, evangelical Christians who've been pestering me about the end times for decades now: I know. I'm as confused as you are. I have no idea why I was taken up into heaven and you were left behind. But here we are. I guess it just goes to show you: You never can tell with God...
• In the event that it's not just me that's raptured away but also my wife and children, would someone reading this blog please make sure to feed our dog, Xena? She'll either be in the back yard or in our house. She's a little shy, but she'll warm up to you eventually. Her food and bowl are in the cabinet underneath the sink. If she's being really good, you can give her a treat as well. Also, if she was in the house, would you please let her go outside? She probably really needs to do her business. Thanks.
• Oh, and we have a parakeet, too, upstairs in the room to the right. Please take it home with you. Its name is Flappy, and he's really friendly...for a bird.
• Would someone please call the Erlanger-Elsmere School District and let them know that I won't be at work on Monday? Please tell them why so that they don't think I won the lottery and just irresponsibly quit. Same with my kids. Please call their school and let them know they won't be in for the rest of the year. My kids have perfect attendance, and I'd hate to see that ruined by the fact that we are out of the country (WAAAAY out of the country).
• I didn't get a chance to finish watching the season ending episode of THE OFFICE last night. I came home late from a school band concert and only watched the first few minutes of it on our DVR before deciding it was too late and that I'd watch it Saturday night. If someone could reply to this post with a brief summary that'd be great. I have no idea if I'll be able to work on this blog in heaven, but maybe I can, and if so, I'll read your comment. On the other hand, if I can get on this blog, I probably could just go to NBC's website and watch the entire episode online. But that's assuming that a broadband connection is available in heaven. Heaven is so far away from any ISP, though, that it'll probably be limited to dial up only. So maybe you HAD better post a summary for me.
• If my clothes were left behind, I guess that means my wallet will be left behind, too. Whoever finds it is free to take the cash and use the credit cards in it. What do I care if my credit gets ruined? I'm gone! I would ask that you not use the two business credit cards that are in there. Ruin my credit, yes, but not the credit of two perfectly good organizations. Just cut those up. Thanks.
• And to everyone who's reading this (assuming I've been raptured): I miss you. Just keep in mind that most of you will be joining me in October. See you then.

David Williams

Just about every time I make a political post on this blog I end up regretting it, but sometimes I just can't help myself...

All that David Williams proved by winning the Republican primary for Kentucky's governor is that he doesn't have much of a shot in November. Consider the following:

• The most populous part of the Commonwealth (Jefferson County/Louisville) voted for a candidate who couldn't afford a single TV ad rather than vote for Williams.
• Ditto for the second most populous part of the Commonwealth (Fayette County/Lexington).
• Ditto for the third most populous part of the Commonwealth (Northern Kentucky).

Mostly what we learned yesterday is what we already knew: No one much likes David Williams. In fact, now that I think of it, I've never met anyone who DOES like Williams. Anyone!

Not that I find Governor Beshear much better. I haven't had much respect for him since he turned coward during the last big budget session, as I mentioned in this previous post. But compared to Williams, Beshear looks great.

I'll make this prediction now: It is going to be one ugly, ugly race. Neither man is afraid to throw punches.

At least it'll be entertaining...

They are a'coming...we hope

In my last blog post I made mention of the terrible weather that we've had this spring. It has been rainy, rainy, rainy, and rainy. Maybe I'm just bitter because my basement flooded thanks to all of the rain, but I don't think that's the only reason I'm down on the weather. EVERYONE I know is down on the weather, too. I really can't recall a spring as wet as this one.

In fact, it's come to this: Saturday my younger daughter ran in the Kentucky middle school state meet in Lexington. She ran in the very first event and in the next to last event, meaning that there were several long hours in between. And thanks to this spring, it was--OF COURSE!--raining. So my wife and I decided that as much as we loved watching the other kids in my daughter's school compete...well, we didn't love watching them compete THAT much, so we left and went to Fayette Mall to kill some time. While we there we walked into a shop that sold sunglasses, and I saw this sign:

That's the kind of spring we've been having. We need signs to remind us that the sun still exists!
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P.S. By the way, don't want to lose an opportunity to brag: My daughter's 3,200 meter relay team (The one that ran the first heat of the first race Saturday) finsihed 5th in the state, earning them a state medal. And though my daughter didn't get a medal in the 3,200 meter run, she DID beat the VARSITY school record by two seconds. Or--since the middle school finals is a sanctioned event--I guess I should say that she broke the OLD varsity school record by two seconds. She's now the proud owner of her high school's 3,200 meter run record...as a 6th grader. Can't wait to see what she can accomplish if she sticks with it!

7 day forecast

Just checked the forecast on Channel 12, WKRC's website. I think whoever made the long range forecast was trying to see how many different ways he could say rain was coming:

No matter how you say it, though, it's been a pretty depressing spring...

Bomb dropped on Gap Band

Federal authorities are investigating a large, explosive device that was detonated at 1:42 AM this morning in the general vicinity of 1980's funk group The Gap Band.


Initial reports pointed to a car bomb as the possible source of the explosion, as several eyewitnesses reported seeing a suspicious, unmarked van parked outside of the hotel where the Gap Band was staying. However, that theory was quickly debunked by federal authorities.


According to Victor Alvares, FBI lead investigator, "All forensic evidence points to an aerial explosion. This definitely was NOT a car bomb. I don't know how, but this bomb was dropped from above."


No injuries were reported in the blast, though Gap Band member Charlie Wilson reported being strangely, sexually excited as a result of the explosion. 

Bad News for Christians

This is going to really upset the people who believe in sanctification by Grace. I was stopped in traffic today and I looked to my left and saw this sign at the entrance to Erlanger Baptist Church:

I don't know what we did as humans to tick off God. Maybe all of the wars. Maybe Global Warming. Maybe putting The Voice on television. In any event, we've gotten Him upset, and there's no one to blame but ourselves. ..

My thoughts about bin Laden

When I first heard last night about the death of Osama bin Laden, my first feeling was one of surprise. Not surprise that we had killed him, but surprise that he had still been alive at all. Though the Taliban had released a few audio tapes of bin Laden over the last few years, there hadn't been any video released. It occurred to me a long time ago that the audio could have been recorded years ago and then altered to sound like it was making reference to current events. I assumed we'd killed him years ago, the Taliban had kept it secret, and we'd never have resolution to the situation. I was completely caught off guard when I saw all of the posts on Facebook last night about bin Laden's death and then turned on the TV to see what was happening.

The second feeling I had was one of relief. I was glad that the search for bin Laden was over. If nothing else, his death provided some rationale for leaving Afghanistan, an idea I couldn't support while bin Laden was alive. Now that bin Laden is dead, I'm less averse to us getting out of there.

I'll tell you one emotion I haven't felt at all, though, and that's joy. I almost felt sick this morning when I turned on the TV to see crowds of people celebrating in the street, as if their local college had just won some national championship. I don't care how bad of a person bin Laden was, he was a human being, and I can't stomach the idea that people were celebrating someone's death.

And right now the strongest feeling I have about all of this is one of sadness. bin Laden may have done terrible things in his life. Heck, let's dispense with the pleasantries. bin Laden DID do terrible things in his life. He orchestrated the death of THOUSANDS of people, and he was glad that they died. If he'd had his way, he'd have killed thousands upon thousands more. He wasn NOT a good guy. His death was deserved. And if I'd been the Navy Seal who got to take the shot, I wouldn't have hesitated.

But as I said above, He WAS a human being. On the day of his birth he was no more evil nor less corrupt than I was on the day of my birth. His death does nothing to assuage the pain of the deaths of those from September 11. His life becomes just one more casualty of this stupid, senseless fight we have on our hands as a result of his actions. And it won't be the last casualty, either. Don't think for a moment that--just because bin Laden is dead--the radicalized Muslim groups are going to disappear. If anything, it may draw them out.

Try as I might, I can't find anything to celebrate today...

Outsmarted by a Bird

The latest solution. Note the horizontal owl still strapped to the hand rail.

Every Monday morning the district administrators at my work gather for a cabinet meeting. Those in attendance usually include the superintendent, the assistant superintendent, the Director of Special Education, the district truancy officer, the English as a Second Language Coordinator, the Director of Finance, and myself. Occasionally someone else will join us. We meet first thing Monday morning to discuss the week ahead and coordinate activities, plan budgets, develop professional development activities, things like that. Important stuff.

This past Monday, though, we spent the first twenty minutes of our hour and a half meeting brainstorming ways to outsmart a robin. Yes, a robin.

Let me back up and explain. About two years ago the front entrance of the board of education building was remodeled. The old, creaky front door was replaced with a fancy, mirrored door and windows. It really is a more attractive entrance, and we haven't had any problems with it. Until this spring. This year a robin has nested somewhere nearby (We haven't found the nest yet; if we had, we'd have destroyed it and the problem would most likely be over!), and has apparently decided that his own reflection in the mirrored glass is another robin that is threatening his territory. He spends a good chunk of the day standing in front of the door pecking on the mirrored glass and chirping angrily. The receptionist has trouble concentrating with all of the pounding on the glass, but if that--and the startled looks from visitors who try to enter the building only to find a peeved robin blocking their way--were the only problem, we'd probably learn to ignore the poor creature. But the REAL problem is the unsightly piles of bird poo poo that this robin leaves behind. "You practically need a stepladder to get over it!" the superintendent said in the meeting Monday. "It's so high!"

The office staff has tried several methods to try to get the bird to stay away from the door. For a couple of weeks a wreath made out of aluminum foil was hung on the front of the door, and that SEEMED to work, but after a few days the robin was back. A maintenance worker then went to a home goods store and came back with two, plastic owls that were mounted one on the hand rail of the entrance and the other on the roof of the building. I suppose this was done with the hope that the robin would think that they were real owls out to eat him. That didn't work for a moment, though. The day they were placed outside I stayed late at work. Alone at my desk, I heard a peck, peck, pecking. I walked out of my office and looked at the door. The robin was standing on one of the owls and pecking at the glass.

The office staff then got so frustrated that they covered all of the windows and doors with brown paper. That DID stop the robin from coming up to the door, but it also was incredibly tacky looking. Our superintendent, who was out of the district the day that this solution was tried, came in the next morning and said, "Oh, no! We are NOT doing that!" So the paper came down and the robin came back.

Next someone suggested that maybe the robin wasn't responding to the owls because the robin couldn't SEE the owls. The robin's nest was probably up high while the owls were down low. So someone strapped an owl lying on his back onto the hand rail so that the owl was facing up and the robin could see him from anywhere. Our receptionist thought that maybe this was making a little bit of a difference (though not a complete solution, as the robin did still come around from time to time), so that owl was left there.

And that brings us back to last Monday. Our superintendent rehashed all of the above for those in our cabinet whose offices aren't in our building (About half of them have offices in the annex on the other side of the district campus, past the high school and the middle school, and the first thing they said Monday morning when they walked into the meeting was, "Why is there an owl strapped to the hand rail?"). Afterwards, we spent time coming up with solutions. Mine was simple: give me a high powered BB gun and let me take a shot at the bird. One of two things would happen: Either I'd hit the bird and kill it (Problem solved!), or I'd miss the bird and hit the door, breaking the glass, which would have to be replaced and could be replaced with clear glass (Again, problem solved!). Our receptionist is a pretty strong animal lover, though, so that idea was thrown out.

The next solution that was tried was to take a bunch of decals of butterflies and plants and stick them all over the windows and doors. I'm not sure what the rationale was here. Maybe the idea was that the robin would be terrified of giant butterflies, or maybe the idea was that the robin would be struck by the unbelievable tackiness of the decals and would be too embarrassed to come anywhere near the building. In any event, this plan was set into motion towards the middle of the week, and the robin did, indeed, seem to stay away from the doors. Everyone thought the problem was solved. I came to work briefly this evening, though, and there was again a fairly large pile of droppings at the entrance. And as I worked in my office I heard the tapping, as of some bird gently rapping at my office door.

I'm out of the district for the first two days of this week, so I'm going to miss the Monday cabinet meeting, but I'm anxious to hear what the next plan will be...