An Open Letter to Sally Field

Dear Ms. Field:

First, I want to begin by saying that I am very much a fan of yours. Though I am too young to remember The Flying Nun or Gidget, I have seen much of your work. I first fell in love with you and your infectious smile watching Smokey and the Bandit. You were awesome in Norma Rae. Your scene in the cemetery in Steel Magnolias was brilliant, bringing me to tears the first time I saw it (and threatening to do the same the many times I've seen it since). And of course, who could forget your Oscar acceptance speech! Like many of your fans, I DO really like you.



However, I have been very concerned about you lately, and that is the purpose of this letter: to ask you to get some help now...before it is too late.

What specifically has been bothering me is the new Boniva commercial that I've been seeing on TV. You know the one I'm talking about: The one that begins with you looking earnestly into the camera and saying, "Well, I just did it! I took my once a month Boniva pill for osteoporosis!" There are two specific reasons why I think this advertisement shows that you need help:

1) You need to set larger goals for yourself!
Whenever I see this commercial I'm always concerned by the sense of accomplishment and satisfaction in your voice as you proudly proclaim that you just swallowed a pill! I mean, come on! What are you doing with the rest of your day that THIS is the thing you've done today that you're proudest of, that you feel a need to announce to millions of people via television? What are your plans for tomorrow? Are you going to get the newspaper off the lawn? Take a shower? Maybe log on and check your email?

You know, Ms. Field, the inability to function at a high level, the feeling that you can't even accomplish the smallest things in life--these are clear signs of clinical depression. I'm not sure osteoporosis is your biggest problem right now. You need to be concerned about possible suicidal tendencies.

2) You're only supposed to take the pill once a month!
You say so yourself, and yet I keep seeing this ad every day, sometimes multiple times a day. Overdosing on prescription medication is dangerous. Your own ad states that Boniva's side effects include diarrhea, ulcers, and pain in your extremities. I imagine that exceeding the recommended dosage by 30 times or more would only increase these side effects. I would guess that the severe diarrhea alone would be one of the reasons you find yourself unable to accomplish much more than swallowing a pill.

I understand that your self-esteem is low right now, and that taking your Boniva--for whatever reason--makes you feel so good. But you simply MUST stop taking it every day.

Oh, and keep in mind that overdosing on prescription pills is ANOTHER sign of clinical depression.

You really need help, Ms. Field. Please, I implore you, get it before it's too late.

Sincerely,
The Sweasy.Net editorial staff